Eastern Europe

BOSNIA

Bridges and Bulletholes

Fig 1.1

Fig 1.2

CROW-ASIA

The natives of CrowAsia are of a more robust physique than those of most other Asian nations. (See Fig 1.4)

Fig 1.3 Bathing

Fig 1.4: The Captain and Tonchi

Captain: I love you.

Tonchi: What did you say?

Captain: You heard me.

Tonchi: -silence- (awkward)

Captain: We´ve worked together for 8 years, side by side. What do you think happens to two people who spend so much time together??

Tonchi: Uh.... Sometimes they become friends?

Captain: I know you feel it too.

Tonchi: But we´re both men! Hairy men with rough palms and sweaty thick necks!

Captain: Let´s go to bed.

Tonchi: Your breath stinks like you ate a shit sandwich.

Captain: I did.

TURKEY

Fig 1.5: Turkey

The turkey is a bird, similar to the chicken but much larger and prettier. It is one of only two creatures known to use the ¨Reverse Chinaman¨ sex position (the other being the Chinaman).

The average Turkish family gobbles down over 100kg of turkey meat per year. Most traditional Turkish garments are made of turkey feathers skilfully woven together, then soaked and pressed to soften the fabric.

Fig 1.6 Bathing

Fig 1.7: Woman in a boat

Fig 1.8: Rock Hard.

Fig 1.9: Full of hot air

¨Full of hot air¨ is an expression used to disparage a Jive-Talker, or someone with a tendency to pass flatus excessively. It also applies to hot-air balloons (HAB´s). The HAB has made several colorful appearances in the history books. The ancient Egyptians invented the HAB and used it to export alcoholic beverages to the Australian Aborigines, and the Wizard of Oz used the HAB to make his famous escape.