Brasil

Charles Yelverton O'Connor, was an Irish engineer who is best-known for his work in Australia, especially the Goldfields Water Supply Scheme. This pipeline — perhaps the world's longest water main — carries water 330 miles (530 km) from Perth to Kalgoorlie. O'Connor was subjected to prolonged criticism by members of the press and also many members of the Western Australian Parliament over the scheme. O'Connor took his own life on 10 March 1902 by shooting himself, while riding his horse into the water at a beach south of Fremantle.



Rio de Janeiro




"Jesus Christ" is the name of this large concrete statue, built in the approximate image of a 1st Century Jewish Apprentice Carpenter. He sits atop a hill above Rio, and it is believed by some that he will one day awake from his stony slumber and wreak vengeance on the Godless masses below.



The Girl From Ipanema



Football at Maracaná (Gallo 3, Flamengo 0)






La Caminhada
Brasil is famous throughout the world for its wild and colourful annual street parade "La Caminhada Alcoologica" (The Alcoholic Walk). Hordes of inebriates stagger through the streets of Belo Horizonte behind a slow-moving fiat with an inflatable sex-doll on it´s roof, music blaring as traffic grinds to a halt behind the parade. Appreciative cheers are extended to attractive female bypassers, and derogatory jeers greet the unattractive.

Cheese

Brasilians believe that any comestible can be improved by filling it with (or wrapping it in) cheese. Cheese is also consumed with great gusto as a main meal in itself, as in this picture.

The Beach

Argentina

Steak

Wine.

Tranquility


5 til 11
Diego poured some more hot water into his teacup then looked at his watch. 5.30pm. He´d finished work and was now at home in his apartment drinking maté. Jesus Christ I´m hungry he thought. There were at least 5 hours to go until dinner. Sometimes he wished that the restaurants in Argentina would open a little earlier, even 8 or 9pm would do. To distract himself from his grumbling stomach he thought about the night ahead of him. He´d put on his pink shirt and slick back his long hair at about 9. At 10 he´d meet his friends, exchange compliments about how good they all looked, and drink some more tea together. At 11 they´d head to the restaurant. He could already smell the grilled rumpsteak, as thick as a telephone directory, drooling blood on his plate. At 1am the bars would open and they´d go out. He´d buy a packet of cigarettes and one fernet and cola - a drink so bitter and repulsive that he´d manage only small intermittent sips and it would last until 7am when it was time to go home.

Since he was a small boy at sleepover parties he´d thought it was extremely cool to stay up all night.

He drank some more tea. His bladder was full and his belly empty. He thought of all the Australian, Irish and English travellers in Argentina who could think of nothing better to do between the hours of 5 and 11pm than to drink piss, so that by the time the bars opened at 1am they were staggering around drunk as gypsies. Jesus H Christ I´m hungry he thought.


Iguazu Falls

Buenos Aires

The lakes district

The slopes

(where are all the people?)

Themed narrative #14
I could smell the old vagrant before I could see him. I was in high spirits walking through the outskirts of the town towards the forest when I passed him. He was sitting on the side of the road, steeped in the stench of beggary. His clothes were tattered and he was scratching like a dog. His eyes picked up when he saw me but I averted my gaze thinking he probably wanted money or some of the spicy beef sausage I was eating at the time. "You be watchin'out for the Brown Goblin!" he squealed at me, and broke into a cackle so high pitched and offensive that a chill ran down my spine and a nearby streetdog began howling. I stopped and stared, slowly chewing my sausage, as spasms of demented laughter shook his frail body. I decided to dismiss his warning as the rambling of a senile fool and I threw a handful of dirt in his eyes for my own amusement before I walked on. Brown Goblin my ass, I thought...

Themes of this narrative: Advice unheeded, mythical creatures, buggery, vagrancy, sausage envy.

Bolivia

As can be seen from the above images Bolivia is a diverse, scenic and often tranquil place. However it is also a place of EXTREME DANGER, a fact to which the local people often seem bolivious.
Here follows a Photographic Guide to the 12 Cardinal Dangers an unwary foreigner may encounter in Bolivia.

1. Crocodiles
They'll eat you up

2. Practical Jokes
The old Chef's-Diarrhoea-On-The-Pancake trick.

3. Huuuuuge bitches. Especially when they have you in the palm of their hand.

4. Public Transport
No terrain is impassable for a Bolivian bus

5. Dusk
Picturesque sunrises and sunsets lure the foreigner into standing still and taking photos. This leaves him vulnerable to attack by huge jungle mosquitoes which are known to transmit Yellow Fever, Down's Syndrome and The Palsy.

6. Anacondas

7. Dinosaurs

8. Deep Shafts

9. Food Poisoning
Hygiene is poor in Bolivian kitchens.

10. Pirañhas
Sometimes you eat the fish, and sometimes the fish eats you.

11. Mustard Blowouts
The incredible blandness of Bolivian cuisine often drives the foreigner to finish a meal with large quantities of straight sauces and condiments.

12. Hand-Eating Monkeys
It is uncommon to see locals with a full complement of digits due to the increasing frequency of attacks such as this one.